Fulfilling the Commission

Whoever you may be, the blog you are either reading or have subscribed to is nothing but a mere drop in the bucket as far as missionary blogs go. Mine will be different from the next, sure, but with all the blogs out there, who really needs to be subscribed to another one and keep up on someone who decides to go globe-trotting for the Lord?

Well, you maybe.

I would encourage you, however, to really think before subscribing to this blog. While I'm gone, I'd like to be able to look over at that sidebar and see my followers and know that they're really going to be reading my posts, praying for the requests, and rejoicing in the triumphs. It'd be sad to think that half the subscribed names weren't praying, watching, laughing, crying, smiling, and rejoicing... So I ask you to think seriously about clicking 'subscribe'.

This blog has been started because of a new adventure looming on my horizon. In fact, wheels are already beginning to turn. I've been waiting, praying, agonizing and crying to God for an answer on this question for months now--and He's given me an answer.

Go.

Last Thursday, I recieved an email early in the morning. From Harvey Steck, principal of Sunshine Orchards, a learning center/school in Thailand. The title of the email was "Can you come?"

The rest is history.

Ages ago, my friend Sharon Steck posted on Facebook that she and her family were going to be coming back to the States for a VISA renewal in July, and then leaving again in September. I got excited--I'd be able to see Hannah and Sharon, who I missed terribly... But something else presented itself to me.

And I laughed it off at first.

You see, I've been interning at Young Disciple Ministries for the last 10 months now, and my internship is up in September. I was wondering what I would do afterwards... And then Sharon's posted blasted its way onto my news feed.

And an idea was born.

Why couldn't I go back to Thailand with them?

I classified myself as crazy and relegated my imagination to a backseat. Not happening.

Yet the idea wouldn't leave me alone. It pressed on me all the time, til finally I had a talk with one of my friends. They suggested I send an email--after all, it couldn't hurt to ask if I'd be needed.

So I did.

And I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

You get the idea.

After what seemed to be half of forever, Sharon emailed me back. And she was excited. I'd almost never seen a more excited email in my life. The message was clear: YES, we could use your help. YES. YES. YES!!

Well, I thought. And prayed. And struggled. And talked. And finally, I filled out my application and emailed it off.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Yes, that long. I waited months, knowing that those processing my application were incredibly busy, but wondering if the long silence was a closed door. Countless prayers wended their way heavenward as the months slipped past; while I talked more, prayed more, thought more. Time was coming right down to it--Id need to get a VISA, funds for a ticket and other essentials, and there were a lot of things that needed to happen. And I still had no answer.

Then last Thursday happened. I'm accepted... and I've accepted the acceptance.

Some months ago, I wrote up the bare bones of a fundraising letter, just in case they accepted me and I would need it. I have a few details I'm waiting on yet, but it's going to be sent out. For real. It's happening.

I'm going to need to apply for a VISA real soon. All the stuff that will go into that could take months, but God knows exactly how to make things work so it won't take long at all. It's HAPPENING....

God only knows what lies between now and the time I step onto the plane headed across the ocean for another land, another culture. But I trust He has it under control... After all, He called; He will supply.

For you, I would say that I covet your prayers. Things are going to take off at an amazing rate, and God is going to perform so many miracles... and yet, being a missionary is scary. Leaving everything you know, to live in a place thousands of miles away, in a country where people speak a different language, is scary... Very much so. And yet, it's thrilling. It gives you shivers of excitement... A deep sense of adventure and new experiences fills everything in you.

However, it won't be easy. It's going to be hard. As someone told me not long ago, it'll likely be the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. And I believe it....

I also know that I'm not qualified to do something like this. I feel totally inadequate. Fears of failing, of not measuring up, of being useless and a burden have come and gone from my thoughts--yet I know that it is only if I'm completely empty of self that the Lord can do the work in me He needs to. In my weakness, He is strong.

So. Off to the horizon. Walking with the Lord... Trusting in His Word. And believing His promises.

And fulfilling the commission: "Go ye into all the world."

Are you with me?